Loyalty Program Manager Gifts

"Can I interest you in our frequent flyer scheme?"

Others will fight for you

'I applied the instant rebate and the returning customer loyalty reward, so that comes to fifty cents.'

You've Got Mail

"I just got a Trump alert with my discount code off my next purchase of Trump baseball caps."

'I want someone who'll not just take the firms line, but the hook and sinker, too.'

"This is as far as your air miles take you."

The whole club stands behind the coach...

"Wow, you've got tons of loyalty points. Someone's a good boy!"

'And how many frequent flyer miles do you have?'

Dog following it's master out of a windows.

'Of course I have your loyalty card - Can you tell me which one it is?'

A hunter has a dream that his dog has brought a game warden to punish him.

"The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog." - Ambrose Bierce

'That's 12 games in a row. As my best friend, it wouldn't kill you to let me win one every once in awhile.'

Punch Card: 'The next divorce is on me.'

'I'm a frequent flier, so it's really quite cheap.'

"This is the director of our customer loyalty program."

'It's not exactly 'cheap' healthcare, but for each test we run, you accumulate frequent-test reward points.'

'How do you think my appeal for loyalty went?'

"Are you a platinum card member?"

"Rex, I've always admired your loyalty to the firm."

"This is Mr. Simmons, who we enticed away from our chief competitor. Of course, being a proven traitor, he can never be trusted."

The key to a successful customer loyalty program is to make people feel special. Watch and learn. How would you like to join our exclusive VIP Premier Exclusive Best Customer Reward Program? The other key is knowing whom to ask. There's minestrone in your eye.

My latest invention is genius. It's an affinity card for our best customers. That's not a new idea. Airlines, rental car agencies, hotels … They all have loyalty programs where you can earn discounts and special treatment. Spare me. Ours has a way better name: The Cafe Exclusive VIP Premier Executive Best Customer Reward Program. And we don't trouble customers with confusing discounts and benefits. All hail the VIP premier cheapskate.

'Is it wrong to accept a loyalty card from more than one supermarket, Father?'

'Welcome - would either of you like to join our Frequent Sinner Programme?'

"What's up with him?" "Travelling on points."

"So there I was at the back of the line waiting for my Covid short when I remembered 'Hey, I'm an American express cardmember!'"

"Thank you for your participation in our loyalty rewards program!"

"You have one billion frequent flyer miles. No wonder you list our airport as your business address."

Wait, don't forget your punch card - If you visit five more times, you get a free secret of the universe!

Jimmy's not a member of our rewards program.

"They say a rescue is out of the question, but they might be able to give us some points."

"I'm trying to position myself as loyal."