Loyalty Program Enthusiast Gifts

'Is it wrong to accept a loyalty card from more than one supermarket, Father?'

Punch Card: 'The next divorce is on me.'

"What's up with him?" "Travelling on points."

My latest invention is genius. It's an affinity card for our best customers. That's not a new idea. Airlines, rental car agencies, hotels … They all have loyalty programs where you can earn discounts and special treatment. Spare me. Ours has a way better name: The Cafe Exclusive VIP Premier Executive Best Customer Reward Program. And we don't trouble customers with confusing discounts and benefits. All hail the VIP premier cheapskate.

The key to a successful customer loyalty program is to make people feel special. Watch and learn. How would you like to join our exclusive VIP Premier Exclusive Best Customer Reward Program? The other key is knowing whom to ask. There's minestrone in your eye.

Mega*Air. Ohh, sorry, sir. With a round trip ticket the frequent flyer miles cancel each other out.

'It's not exactly 'cheap' healthcare, but for each test we run, you accumulate frequent-test reward points.'

"Considering we eat here every day, you'd think they'd have a loyalty program."

Others will fight for you

'Not here - home!'

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

"I'm supposed to be loyal, relieve stress, be 'Man's best friend'...I don't need this kind of pressure!"

a new hire signing a loyalty oath

We're so pleased with your twenty years work, we've decided to offer you a two year short term contract.

'I applied the instant rebate and the returning customer loyalty reward, so that comes to fifty cents.'

You've Got Mail

"All the way from the new home in Rye just so she can sniff our old doorman."

'Mr. Bigmeister likes to start each meeting with the pledge of allegiance.'

"Must that dog follow you everywhere?"

'Fetching your slippers when you were chairman of the board was one thing, but now that you're an ordinary citizen...'

"This is as far as your air miles take you."

"The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog." - Ambrose Bierce

'And how many frequent flyer miles do you have?'

'Of course I have your loyalty card - Can you tell me which one it is?'

"Yeah you've always been loyal, so what? You're fired."

"Wow, you've got tons of loyalty points. Someone's a good boy!"

"I hear you're the expert on loyalty."

Dog following it's master out of a windows.

'That's 12 games in a row. As my best friend, it wouldn't kill you to let me win one every once in awhile.'

'OK, Mr. Altruism, real fast, name three selling points of loyalty that don't involve food.'

Documentary Proof - A Dog Lost hundreds of feet from home can easily find his way back.

"You're my best friend, Bandit."

'All those years you struggled financially, I stood by you. It's my turn for a little piece of the pie.'

"I know you three wanted the promotion to V.P. However, my dog has been a loyal friend, so he gets the job."