Low-carb Dieters Gifts

"Don't tell me we're eating Paleo again."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

"One slice—hold the bread."

'What makes the Tower of Pisa lean?' 'It never eats.'

"It just wasn't working out. He's liberal low-carb and I'm strict keto."

A diet high in cholesterol can be dangerous to your health.

"You're suffering from an overdose of food."

Church of the Low-Carbs

"He tried intermittent fasting. But settled on continual slowing."

"One gluten-free, lactose-free, low carb pizza."

"THIS YEAR I'M GOING TO GET IN SHAPE."

The good and bad news for the species is we have less fat than beef.

"I said, I'm on a garlic diet. So far, I've lost 5 pounds and 12 friends."

Maude finally gets rid of her giant ass.

'Not that we don't appreciate the popcorn, but how about something low-carb next time?'

'Not only can we build it for the same price as any other gingerbread house.. but we can do it for 40 LESS CARBS!'

Low Carb Slop

"The clouds of heaven have a load limit of 65 KG! Everyone over the load limit sinks down to Hell! 65,3 KG! You should not have eaten that last cake!"

'Ol' Zeke across the mountain's been stealing all my business with his new low-carb moonshine!'

'She might prefer the low-carb alternative...or any alternative.'

'No thanks, I'm on a low carb diet.'

"You don't think I'm cheating on my special, low-carb diet, do you?"

Slimming World

"This Subway Diet is way better than that Atkins nonsense."

'Polly wants a cracker!' 'Maybe we should switch to low-carb crackers?!'

"It's a vicious circle! He quits smoking, gains 20 pounds, goes on a diet."

Overweight Woman Cheating On Scales.