Lovesick Humorist Gifts

"Of course my hands are warm, baby. All my blood has rushed to my seuxal organs."

"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a buoy..."

'That was close...hit me right in the wallet.'

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

You got what you deserve … you deserve each other.

"It's over, Martin. I've met someone with bigger cheeks."

Phoenix

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

"Thanks for calling it skinnydipping."

"Believe me when I tell you that I'm not that honest."

Barman In Love.

"How barbaric! Females should be wooed by colourful displays, not fighting!"

Tunnel of Like.

"There's only the four of us. I hope you like doo-wop."

This year Mike decides to make his own Valentine's cards.

Daffodil bulbs

'I love you, Howard, but let's not jump to conclusions.'

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

"You're not sick, you're just in love." "I'd like a second opinion."

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

Prison Romance.

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

Caterpillars in love

'For the last time, Butchie, I love you but I'm not in love with you.'

Homophone Encounter

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."

Dating in 2020

"I never turn into a prince on a first date."

'I hear they wrote their own vows.'

"In mitigation, Sunny Chemicals would like to point out that prior to contracting his skin allergy, Mr Crumb was already ugly."

"Yes, you've taught me a thing or two - but over twenty-plus years that's not much."

"Milton Woolburg, founder of traditions, legends, and general flimlam."