Lover Of Rural Humor Gifts

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

'Sometimes Bessy still wondered if not going to Chicago on the cattle car with the others had been best.'

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

I fart more than that!

Milking the Cow.

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

A Venus cow trap.

"Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're our only hope."

Cow in a vest: Well, I think I look like Bruce Willis!

'It's negative attention ... as long as you keep asking why, they'll keep on doing it.'

"In honor of your birthday I had your face tattooed to my ass."

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

'Is it ok if I just bring in some of our carpet?'

"He keeps watching over our flock. I think it's a stalker."

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

Early American Think tank

Cow has caught a frisby in his udders

What's your returns policy on faulty goods?

COWS: Spare cow

'I met my wife on Faeces Book.'

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

'Of course there is room for advancement. You certainly can't go down from here.'

Close, but no cigar!

Nice six-pack!

'Got any cud flavour?'

"I stink... therefore, I am."

"Can you milk a cow?"

I think we need to lose the 'Singing Ringing Tree'!

Cow cleaning his teeth with string.

Prank Cattle Calls. (mmph)

Thanks for the tip. Come again!