Lover Of Questions Gifts

'The Question'

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

Exciting potato bugs.

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

"Scientists may need a trillion dollar atom smasher to explore the fundamental questions of the universe, but all you need is one too many."

Sensitivity Reader's Digest

"Daddy, why do people pull round pizza from square boxes and cut them into triangles before they eat them?"

'If it 'tells' the time, why do I have to look at it?'

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

Ostrich Curoisities

LATE NIGHT WITH DAVID MAMET

'I see an applicant being hired!'

Philosophy Test Today. This "Meaning of Life" question -- is that essay or true-false?

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

"He's Right Behind Me, Isn't He?"

What's the antidote for wheat germ?

Why can't you use the brains God gave you? Oh, shoot, I think this is Bob's.

'Did you get through to the speaking clock, Dear?' 'Tick and tock and tick and tock and tick...'

News and Magazines. Record Debt. Dollar Down. How can the dollar be weak when we've been giving it such a good workout?

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

Think we knew each other in a past life, Randy? I don't believe in past lives. In fact, I don't believe in the past. Or the future I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight? ... Sorry, that's Randy's line #42. Reflex. Wait, let me write that down.

"He says he's a Professor of Rhetoric but I'm not persuaded."

Upside down question mark hanging from fishing line.

"Do you think it's an accident of history that Freemasons live in houses and we live in trees?"

'Am I covered if a car falls on my tree?'

Ted gets nabbed driving under the influence of Leo Buscaglia.

"Does this bird make me look fat?"

Some owls aren't content just knowing who.

The social isolation of the entomologist...

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Celestial Sadie, In the Western sky after sunset, Jupitor can be seen nearly aligned with Venus. What do you make of this? R. Yates. Excellent question. That reminds me of a long lost civilization, in which there was no such thing as a typo. Where no one ever hit the wrong key because they wrote letters by hand. Eventually, it became so obsessed with speed that it began typing everything, and so inconsiderate that it soon stopped bothering to proo

"All it says is 'DON'T WALK.' When you think about it, that still leaves a world of possibilities, Baby!"

"Would you describe your gall as mitigated or unmitigated?"