Lover Of Funny Relationship Comics Gifts

"I really don't like how you're always trying to assert yourself."

Life is for the birds.

"First date hairball... awkward."

Hello. I'm Ferdinand. I'll be monitoring the levels of bull at your table this evening. Menu. Menu.

'Stop complaining woman, you wanted a boating holiday!'

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

"Open a wine that will make me want to watch the shows you want to watch."

"You don't sniff my butt anymore."

"It's Doris Kearns Goodwin. Is there anything we'd like to know about the Presidency?"

"This merger is not producing the expected synergies."

'I knew you would come crawling back.'

'I just want to be sure to get this right. You met again your imaginary childhood friend and then happened WHAT?'

'Roger, you're just a Rooster and I'm just a Hen. Is all of this necessary?'

'Looks like the Wentworths are still on the outs.'

"Well that's the last of our offspring gone - let battle commence."

'Oh that's weird! i just had a shiver go down my wallet. My wife must have just bought something.'

One cheese omelette, and I've never cheated on my husband. Um, okay. Anything else? A side of hash browns for this one-man woman! And a chocolate as hot and sweet as my intensely singular love for this phenomenal guy. Chuck? Yes dear? I've been having an affair for the last six months. Oh don't act surprised. One scone, and what the @#$% just happened? The denial and snacks before the storm.

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

What do I want out of our relationship? Same thing anyone wants. Good value.

'My wife says not to worry. She's convinced she can get me out of here with coupons.'

"What makes you think I doubt your abilities?"

"Fancy crashing at my pad later, babe?"

'I'm leaving my wife because of another woman. Her mother.'

'Actually thursday'll be a perfect time to come by Penny. That way you'll finally get the chance to meet my other half.'

"Manfred, don't get so defensive!"

"Ogden, you're taking yourself too damn seriously."

"I liked it better when we just had your people call my people."

"I'm sorry your wife doesn't understand you, but this is a dry cleaner's."

'Marry me!'

'Sorry, I'm afraid it was a false alarm. It turns out that 'the emergency gas leak' was my husband.'

"Do you have to put tomato sauce on everything?"

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

'I swear I didn't know you'd heard that joke before...'

"He's a terrible drunk."