Love Life's Jokester Pillows

"I take her out every night, but she keeps on coming back."

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a buoy..."

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

A couple dressed as a knife and a fork

"Oh I have plenty of sex appeal. It's all here in my bank baalance."

Wind Tunnel of Love.

"Believe me when I tell you that I'm not that honest."

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

"Remember when we talked about how you send mixed messages. . ."

'Despite his laser eye surgery, he still doesn't see the mess he leaves in the living room every day.'

"So yeah - This is my ideal first date."

'Actually, I do mind wearing your pedometer!'

"Do you think someday we'll look back on this and laugh?"

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

Consenting Adults.

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

Speech-bubble-head-boy loves think-bubble-head-girl.

"Pretty impressive for a product of a 3-D printer."

Men dancing

"If I'd known, I would've changed my vows to; Until bald and fat do we part."

"I'm gonna talk to her. How's my breath?"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"With other dates I've been on, long walks on the beach seemed like a cliche, but with you it really feels genuine."

"Maybe we'd kiss better if we had lips."

'I now pronounce you hooked and booked.'

"Hey. When I want your help, I'll ask for it."

'Mom, would you have married Dad if you had seen him in high definition first?'

'When I said that I'd 'give you a ring', I meant on the phone. . .'

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

"If we're to have a serious relationship Nigel, you must stop ringing my bell and running away."

'Honestly, I didn't mean any of those things I wrote about you in my diary last night!'

'Okay Dad, time to unwind.'