Romantic Jokester Pillows

"Hey, you two, get an office!"

'Okay, you win-we're still married after 25 years. Are you going to buy me a gift with your winnings?'

'Lets synchronize our meds and meet back here when the time is right.'

'If that's your Porsche ignition key, why does it have a little picture of a robin with Reliant underneath?'

"Till death do us part? Does that mean by natural causes, or would an accident count?"

The Three Little Words every woman wants to hear - 'the football's finished'.

'The middle one is cute.'

'No, it's not my new look. Just another random 'loves me, loves me not' dispute.'

'When I said that I'd 'give you a ring', I meant on the phone. . .'

"I'm okay. I just had a heart attack."

'Your intoxication beauty has made me forget my problems, my inhibitions, my wallet. Would you mind paying for the check?'

'A babe magnet? Shouldn't that be a fridge magnet?!'

"That should keep your fancy self-wind watch going for a couple of weeks..."

"You're not blowing me off, are you?"

"Seriously...girls have their own language!"

'We were on the way out of the house before I remembered I needed something for the valentine party today.'

"Not tonight! I have carpal tunnel syndrome!"

"Darling, you complete me!"

'It's his idea of a joke'

'Sure it's hyena - you said you wanted a FUN fur!'

"Too much French kissing, I'm afraid. You've got athlete's tongue."

'Expecting someone, are we?'

'Suzy, I hate to break the news to you like this, but there's a good reason why your new boyfriend doesn't fit in amongst the townsfolk too well...Yes Suzy. He's a Notorious Outlier.'

'Oh, I don't paint -- I'm a make-out artist!'

"Okay, so I faked it...you happy now?"

"Visiting hours are over Mrs. Jones..."

"I'd love to go to your place with you but it's our place. You're my husband."

"Of course my hands are warm, baby. All my blood has rushed to my seuxal organs."

I think this is the start of a beautiful relationship...

"If we're to have a serious relationship Nigel, you must stop ringing my bell and running away."

Tinder/Target

"Pretty impressive for a product of a 3-D printer."

By the way, I've been undressing you with my eyes. I'd like to apologize to my eyes. !!

Final score: her-1, you-0

"My girlfriend said you were cute, but, gosh, she didn't say how cute."