Lounge Lizard Gifts

"Are you sure your teacher gave you time off for good behavior?"

Naked cocktails

Potato singing - 'Peelings,, Nothing more than Peelings,,'

'I should outline his body in chalk.'

What this story needs is a good chase scene

Excess Baggage: Why can't airports provide a decent place for paying customers to catch forty winks?

"In closing, I'd just like to say you've been a great crowd, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitress, and I hope this final number breaks your heart the way show business broke mine."

Mile High Club

"Ya know what I miss most Kevin? Crowded bars and restaurants. Where the rest of the world is right this very minute."

Football Chameleon

Annie, the Reptile version: 'The sun will come out tomorrow! Tomorrow! You will sun yourself tomorrow!'

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

Monitor lizard becomes milk monitor.

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

'I'm very proud of my El Gecko.'

Couch Potatoes

"I'm not 'just sitting here' — my mind is all over the place."

Lizard Amusement Park

"Graham loved his creature comforts."

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

"You don't understand, Mom. Our staying in and watching TV is not the same as you and Dad staying home and watching TV in Dayton, Ohio."

'Mr Godzilla - you need anger management!'

A dog on an island with a man wants to take a walk.

Ereptile Dysfunction

The Great Maldini and his Venomous Snakes

Art Gecko.

Cool coffee: An adult millennial daycare.

"Well, sometimes I'll just hang around and do nothing. Oh wait, that's all the time."

Wine Bar, "Am I not the most fashionable lounge lizard about town ?"

Didn't I tell you that Komodo Dragons are real dragons? Look: My Daddy can breathe fire...

'Why is so much easy listening so difficult to listen to?'

Gordon Gekko

"I think it's great these things can regenerate their tails, but how do they lose them?"

'Don't they look silly?'

"Where has he gone now?"