Beach Lounge Lizard Gifts

A dog on an island with a man wants to take a walk.

'Not that net!'

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

'I cleaned over thirty fish today.' - 'That takes guts.'

Honey remember what I said about feeding the birds.

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

'What I like best about a magnum of Champagne is, it's a controlled portion.'

Businessman in suit on beach with financial report and eyes cut out viewing impending storm.

"This place is nice, but what would we really do if we lived here? Lie around and be happy all the time?"

The Old Lady Bobbing-Around-In-The-Ocean Classic.

There is no hurricane season in Aruba...

Lighthouse Hammock.

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, fell, and retained a brilliant attorney."

Excess Baggage: Why can't airports provide a decent place for paying customers to catch forty winks?

'I prefer to do absolutely nothing on holiday....otherwise the shock's too much when I get back.'

"Graham loved his creature comforts."

"Gucci Firenze 1921"

"In closing, I'd just like to say you've been a great crowd, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitress, and I hope this final number breaks your heart the way show business broke mine."

"You don't understand, Mom. Our staying in and watching TV is not the same as you and Dad staying home and watching TV in Dayton, Ohio."

"Delivery."

"This will look great on our bedroom wall."

Sooners! Opening day of fishing.

'Ask me about my portfolio.'

"I'll bet a lot of people wish they had a royal palace to return to."

'I've still got the fire in my belly, but for the next two weeks I'm solar powered.'

Cool coffee: An adult millennial daycare.

'Perhaps the fish don't realize you have a license to catch them.'

Mile High Club

"Honey, you're not working on your computer? You're taking this vacation thing a little too far, aren't you?"

Naked cocktails

And as the sun sets over the hills...

Wine Bar, "Am I not the most fashionable lounge lizard about town ?"

Trucker's tan.

It's called "stuck on the beach"? Sure, why not, I'll try one.

"I'd invite you back to the house for a glass of iced tea, but I'm afraid our kitchen isn't kosher."