Loud Noise Navigator Gifts

'Wear you hearing protection or else!'

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.

"I scream! You scream! I can't stop the screaming!"

"We tried 'Baby Mozart,' but he prefers 'Baby John Cage.'"

Noisy energy?

"You kept me awake all night, grinding your gums."

Dog thumping tail on floor, man below thumping ceiling with broom.

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

'In my experience, life is good most of the time, but come the holidays, they look at me as if I'm a nuisance...'

'Look, honey, the baby's got your mouth.'

"I'd know my tinnitus anywhere and this isn't it."

"Why haven't noise cancelling headphones been invented yet?"

I'm beginning to regret the hearing aids.

Things You Should Know About...

"I was going to go to the other slop trough, but the music's always too loud."

"Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?"

A musical instrument shop is positioned next to a silent treatment shop.

"My nose whistling is keeping me awake all night."

"I find that incessant barking eases the pain."

'Whoever said practice makes perfect never had kids with drum sets.'

I've found it! It was in the bread box! You've found the lost cellphone! SMASH! CRASH BOP! SMASH! Today's feature is offered as a catharsis for anyone who has ever lost a cellphone and been forced to listen to its low-battery beep from some undiscovered place. SMASH. Final beep (Death).

Nature Magnified

Echo Hills - Please bear with us while we lower the decibel level.

'Now she's frightened of your snoring...'

Competitions.

Moral Ambiguity

'Hank, I think I see why your dog is complaining about the ringing in his ears.'

Yingluck Shinawatra - first female prime minister in Thailand

"The firm is very careful about health and safety issues. If you witness ANY accidents you're to press this big red button so that the media management team can come in to avoid any bad press."

Mass Piano Instruction in Communal Home

'It's only an owl.'

"I hate to say this, but I miss the days when all he did was stare at his phone."

Plane annoys penthouse apartment.

CONNNCREEETE!