Looking For A Relationship Pillows

'It's hard to choose. Can you find out if the second one from the left is married?'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"I use broccoli rabe as a litmus test."

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

Still searching for my Prince Charming.

Planned Parenthood: Not Tonight Dear. I Have a Headache.

Biological Cuckoo clock

So … how did you two meet?

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

"Ideally, I'm looking for a guy who can make me smile."

Financially Secure Romantic with sufficient fire in belly seeks damsel in distress...

"You like taking long walks in the rain? My dogs will love you!"

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

'Hand me the 'desperates'.'

"Look I've already said, I'm not going to bed with you on our first date"

'I used to equate life and art -- then I married Art.'

"Being a refrigerator magnet is fine, but I wish, for just one day, I could be a chick magnet."

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

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"I think you two may hit it off. Craig, here, is an attractive male academic in his early forties who seeks a warm, vivacious woman delighting in conversation, arts, and nature for an evolving romantic commitment, possibly marriage, while you, Vivian, are a good-looking, intelligent, stimulating woman in her late thirties who seeks an educated, unattached, well-bred man concerned with ideas, culture, and the environment with whom to share your life interests and companionship."

"Sure, I can help you improve your mating call: that's my specialty..."

"There she is! Don’t be nervous. Just be yourself, walk over there and sniff her."

'Love and marriage?- I'm afraid I can't help you much with that, young fellow.'

"...Also, true love is eventually tax deductible."

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

"We met through a contact tracing app."

Sue believed that one day she would find her soul mate - and her missing sock.

'Sylvia, what do you say we take the big step and see if we could really stand one another offline...?'

"That's what happens when you start a relationship at work!"

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"Okay, I'll wear a tie."