Long-term Relationships Gifts

"Surprising me- that's your life's work."

"75"

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

"I'll bet there's a story there."

"Do we have any for 25 years? That's a good one, sir! I can't wait to tell that to the rest of the staff!!"

"Not really all that different... We've been living apart for decades."

So Close..

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

Albert & Myra - The End Story

Reading the sports pages.

Missing You.

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"We don't have sex any more, we argue about money and you hate my mother. We should be married."

"Twenty five years... I think it's time we renew our towels."

(Scheduled) Sex, (Prescription) Drugs & (Classic) Rock & Roll

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"You kept me awake all night, grinding your gums."

"I said, 'You must be waiting for 'Mr. Right,' too.'"

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

"You knew I was a migratory bird when you married."

Cards, Missing You, Missing Ewe (a ram looking for a card for his loved one),

'Silly thing, of course I still find you repulsive.'

"It's chirp, chirp, chirp time again, isn't it?"

"Happy anniversary, Clare. How'd you make it so many years?" "Figured it wasn't worth the prison time."

"We should never have committed binary fission!"

"Yes, you've taught me a thing or two - but over twenty-plus years that's not much."

"Stop undressing me with your eyes."

"I hunt, she gathers, but we always get together for cocktails at five."

"Are you still mad at me?" "Mentally I'm storming off right now."

A planet like ours - Penguin to camel - "It wouldn't work either way my darling. I'm getting sunburnt out here and back home you'd freeze to death."

"Well, we can eat out, order in, or just sit here and let our bodies slowly gnaw away at our muscle tissue."

'You were married to him for 40 years. He never once mentioned he was having his head cryogenically frozen?'

"Martin, did we ever get our freak on?"

"Don't you think after thirty years of marriage you could stop referring to me as 'the military'?"