Lonely Heart Gifts

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

Day 14 of self-isolation and the cat still hadn't responded to any attempts at conversation.

"Plenty of fish"

"Unfortunately all his friends were just on Facebook."

Monday is indeterminate species night.

'Over five thousand friends, and not one remembered my birthday.'

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

I'm looking to settle down with a nice light bulb, should I try the internet.

"A works outing is pretty dull when you're self-employed."

An old man in an hourglass filled with hearts

ONE HORSE TOWN

'Openly sobbing, or non-openly sobbing?'

Drinking Companions

'Maybe we should talk to him more, Malcolm.'

Table for two. Whom does sir think he's kidding? You're right table for one. Menu.

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"It's lonely here at the top. Thank goodness I've never been a people person."

Desert Planet

'And the winner of the 'biggest loser in love' category is...'

"All of my friends are imaginary."

'I'm worried about myself, Doc...I'm not spending much time with other cats.'

"Do you think solitude drives you insane?"

Love on the slopes

Snub Marine

"Since no one showed up, I'll keep my remarks brief."

'Sigh - Yes, I will probably be dying alone.'

'Is this the Lonely Hearts Club?'

'I HATE Spring cleaning!'

Hell, yes, it's lonely at the top. Plus I get nosebleeds.

'Some people don't like working from home - they go a bit mad with the solitude.But I've got you, haven't I Mr Floppity Ears.'

A jester surrounded with love hearts

'I told you that nobody would show up.'

"sometimes it gets lonely being self employed and working alone."

'You are daydreaming all the time. When are you going to mature?'

"I'm not afraid of being alone. I just need someone around to discover my corpse because I can't afford a housekeeper."