Locker Antics Gifts

When placed in the hands of the right person on a long vacation, even egg salad could be a deadly weapon.

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'

The locker room door suddenly swings open, and Randy is busted by a steroid-sniffing dog.

'I found this bag of salad hidden in the locker room - who's is it?'

Cleaning Lockers.

"Okay, there's one thing I like about school starting. I have a girlfriend this year."

'We've got a personal hygiene foul! Number 70!... Fifteen yards!!'

'Same tragic story...A disgruntled athletic trainer burst into the locker room and starts taping players at random...'

'Aw, come on guys - at the end of the day, it's only a game - right?'

'And don't shrink it in a hot wash.'

"Well, once again I find myself all pumped up with no place to go."

"He's brutal but considerate - that's his victims' support number, NHS direct."

You Don't Know What It's Like

'Okay, so we're 4 and 8 this season. Take away those 8 losses and we're undefeated!'

'Nobody will see it in the sauna. Besides, how bad can your birthmark actually be?'

'Relax, the game is over.'

You were great last night

The first day of school is always filled with crazy emotions. Joy and trauma. Triumph and failure. Frustration and disappointment. And that's just dealing with my cruddy new locker.

"Okay, seriously guys, who's not wearing deodorant?!"

Size matters!

'Athletic Trainer in the locker room...'

Locker Room. Ernie, on the radio they said your poor play caused eight sacks! What did the coaches think? I guess they were unhappy -- They were the ones the team owners sacked.

Just minutes before the big game Gerald realizes he grabbed the wrong gym bag.

"I was being honest with him, he said he was being honest with me, so now we don't know who to trust."

'This is the NBA, Doug. It's a whole new level. You need to stop referring to your locker as 'my cubby'...'

'I'm just saying - it doesn't help morale.'

'He took a pass and disappeared?'

'Hey Kekyll c'mon you should have changed by now.'

'Let him stay, coach. He couldn't find his team's locker room.'

'You've lost a step...'

'Brian discovers that 'Slide To Unlock' doesn't work when you've forgotten your locker combination.'

'Oh, yeah, and no whackin' off the night before a game!'

"Men's locker room. Caution: May not be as offensive as you've been led to believe."

Women after 10 minutes vs men after 10 years.