Livestock Lover Gifts

"First we get a bunch of cows."

"I don't want to worry you, but this years prize winning pig, usually ends up as next years prize winning sausages."

'You're stampeding yourself! You're stampeding yourself!'

"Well...from what I can remember, your father looked a bit like a turkey baster."

'I used to call Doctor Hinshaw, but he was always wantin money...

Farm Humor.

'Hey man! That stuff brings them in fast!'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

Inflatable Cows

'Name tag's up here, Ma'am - I'm from the Cattlemen's Delegation.

'Was that the only balling gun you had with you, Doctor?'

"I have four stomachs and one of them always seems to be hungry.''

Livestock cart.

'Well Alice. Now do you know what cull means?'

'A balling gun! How have you been giving her those uterine boluses?'

'Sorry, Bess. The farm supply sent us the wrong cow bell.'

Chase me, chase me cows.

"I majored in sheep with a minor in cat herding."

'This always stops the scours...

'My wife, my rancher, his artificial insemination device!'

Will work for grass

Cheesie Rider

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'I'm a fat cattle buyer.'

'My neighbor hates to fix fence...'

'I don't know if she's gonna be much good. I don't think she's even registered.'

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

Oh you baad bad girl!

'This is the Polled Texas Longhorn - the breed of the future!'

'Fat Cattle' - Duke of Bedford and The Triumphs of Selective Breeding

According to this program, cows have four stomachs so they can digest the grasses they eat. You must be watching "Graze Anatomy."

And if you help drive the herd all the way to Kansas City, you get to keep one steer for yourself! The first stock option.

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

Freshest ice cream in town!