Liverpool Loyalist Gifts

Kenny Dalglish

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

"Who do you like in the super bowl?"

Best friends without borders.

Kobe Bryant

"For goodness sake, stop this daily whining! She's just gone to work, she'll be back tonight! Get a grip!"

Trent Alexander-Arnold

Football addict

Replica Football Merchandise

Ball and Chain

'Kaplan, you've been traded. ...Sorry about the tattoos.'

'Don't look at me like that! I know it's a banned substance, OK? But how can I compete if I'm the only one in the league not using spinach?!'

Virgil van Dijk

"I wonder why the kids named me Mourinho? I hope it's not because I'll only last a few days..."

'What do you mean foul? I had a shower this morning!'

"At least you get to wake up from your nightmares."

'...and the Brewery are considering giving you a loyaly card!'

'Go deep my son.' 'What's it all about?'

"Get another job? I can't! My breed can only be faithful to one master in a lifetime!"

Snowman about melting snowman: 'Just once I'd like to meet someone who isn't a fair weather friend.'

Victim support

Sadio Mane

"The Browns are the only team in the NFL to have a malpractice squad."

"Money won't make you happy. Real happiness comes from having me as your best friend."

Footballers - Jamie Redknapp

Liverpool FC Chairman - "It's Man United, they want to know if we've any trophy cabinets going spare."

'. . . I know Stan. . . but one day you'll joke about this.'

'This is an amicable split. Coach O'Neill has done a great job. We just have different ideas...'

'With your two left feet you ain't got a prayer, mate!'

Dog checks out His Master's Website.

'I see you haven't paid me yet!'

'That's what I like about him, he always pays his round.'

"How old were you before you discovered our football song wasn't the national anthem?"