Little Literati Gifts

"As you can see, I've learned the alphabet."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

A is for App...B is for Blogger...C is for Celebrity.

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

"You can use the alphabet to text. You can use the alphabet to tweet. Why can't you use the alphabet to spell?"

"Barb's such a fast reader."

'This is your spinal column...It's a bunch of bones that runs up and down your back and keeps your legs from going all the way up to your neck.'

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

Library

"What would you recommend to hold a seven-year-old girl's attention in a car from East Seventy-eighth Street to Bridgehampton?"

"Ah, to be young and foolish again."

'All I wanted to know is if that word was naughty.'

Child lifting alphabet blocks.

'Well, so my grades are A,B,C,D... at least I'm learning my alphabet.'

It's a picture book. The words aren't called "subtitles."

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

Good writing is good thinking

Cat going to litter box with newspaper to read.

Kid to other: 'It's been a crazy day. I caught a bug and tossed my cookies.'

Maid revealing that the judge uses a dictionary when writing

"I'd text you, but I haven't learnt to spell yet."

'Well how do you spell it then?'

'Literacy is NOT overrated!'

"I'm not good with letters."

'Hey! We can play Scrabble while we eat!'

Car's bumper sticker reads: 'My other car is a bookmobile.'

'I'm taking post-graduate work to learn how to read at least the fifth grade level.'

'We want to be ready for when he starts to read.'

Teacher reading.

Night of the Living Well-Read

Kid reader to librarian about 'Parenting' book: 'This didn't tell me anything about how to deal with parents.'

Bad Gramma Skool

'I need an example of a collective noun.'