Literary Teacher Gifts

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'Secondhand smoke.'

A Puppet Named Juan

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

"You're going to hate yourself."

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

Nathaniel Hawthorne

Frontispiece to the first volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

Victor Hugo

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

'Hamlet'

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"Now Playing: One of those Jane Austen movies."

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

Shakespeare was bisexual

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

The Demise of Tinkerbell

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

The ghosts of Christmas yet to come.

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."