Poetry Teacher Gifts

'This lot? Word-perfect with every song in the hit parade but can't remember a single line of poetry!'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"You're going to hate yourself."

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. Summer's almost over

"Do me next."

Edgar Allen Poe

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Now I really hate poetry."

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Why we need poetry. . .

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

When the world is Mud-luscious - e.e. cummings

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

John Bunyan

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

Updated Nursery Rhyme #27.

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

The ghosts of Christmas yet to come.

Blue Stockings - Female poet who has not sold any of her books

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

Letters escape from a caged book.

The Forbidden Joyce Kilmer

"The rolling wheels...the ringing bells...signal the deliciousness of summer."