Linguistic Jugglers Gifts

German Spelling Bees

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

"We have an acronym!"

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

A Bloody Butcher

Wordplay: In The Bag.

"I never accomplish the impossible, if I did it would become an expectation."

Introducing...Anagraman.

"It's time to retire the word 'profit'."

'Excellent!...We've been looking to hire someone who can think outside the box.'

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

'Would everyone please phrase their questions in ones and zeros please.'

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

'A High-pain job? Yes, I believe we have that.'

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

"It's a swearbox."

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

"There's a conversation to be had around a piece of work I'd like us to do tonight."

A man looking into a mirror saying "HA!"; his reflection looking back at him from the mirror is saying "!AH".

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

"We were looking for somebody with experience in mumbo-jumbo but your resume is mainly about gobbledegook."

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

"I'll start thinking outside the box when the box is empty."

Harris, our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done.

'I was headhunted.'

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

"Remember, when they go low... we observe shareholder value and act accordingly."

'All my venture capital is tied up in Miss Umpley, there.'

Supermarket: Leafs, Rail Leafs