Lighthearted Law Enforcers Gifts

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

Next camera crew 5 mins

"Do you know why I pulled you over? Do you? Do you? Yes, you do."

"Let's take in a trial."

Kid in pedal police car pulling over a kid on a trike

"I'd like my son seated in the first row."

'This is a phone poll! Are you in favor of a ban to drive and use a cell phone at the same time?'

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

'I hate frisking magicians!'

"Yeah, well, you sure don't drive like a slow loris."

"I've only had eighteen pints and can drive perfectly well osifer...why don't you go and arrest some real criminals?!"

'This is just a routine check, sir -- are you a turtle?'

"Very well done, Samuels. But next time, don't forget your handcuffs."

"I'm giving you a fine for illegal parking. I don't care if this is a traffic jam."

'I'm sorry, Mum. But, if I let you off, I'll have to let everyone's mum off.'

Policeman receiving an award of a truncheon

'I said to recite the alphabet. You may not google it!'

Drunk police officer

"Confound it! "Shoot first and ask questions later" doesn't apply to the interrogation room!"

Boy caught by a policeman

Cop Out

Police appeal for information whilst thugs appeal for silence.

I can assure everyone that this city is totally committed to apprehending the pants bandit!"

'I used to love this job. You could get away with anything.'

'You must be new on the force.'

'Could we pay you the parking fine? We've got to go out of town.'

"You have the right to remain silent – but, it would be helpful to know what you think."

"The reason I can't show you my licence is because you took it away from me yesterday!"

"It's a Mountie thing...we always get our man."

"Got any I.D.?"

'Do you have any form of identification?'

"You have your high beams on."

Neutralizing the thief

'Your wife got the house and the puppies.. but I managed to get you all the buried bones.'

'You know, I thought about becoming a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.'