Lighthearted Humor Gifts

'Blind leading the blind'

"Let's cross over, those LED street lamps give me a real buzz..."

A Golden Non-Retriever

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

Daffodil bulbs

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

"Oh boy, by the way this guy is moving, we can assume he's got some of our friends in his pants..."

"Yes, "breeding like rabbits" is often used in a pejorative sense. The truth is, we don't care as we love having kids..."

Shoe repair

'How now, brown cow?'

'Vacuums!'

Surreal Ale Pub.

"My reflexes are not what they used to be: This is how I catch birds now..."

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

'What colour is a hiccup?'

Just Survived My 3rd COVID Scare Dance.

"Is the light bothering you?"

'Any idea where my night vision visor is?'

Yeti/Not Yeti

Beach Attraction

Soldier With Mouse Ears.

"Stay back. I don't know what he's got, but I'm afraid it's catching."

Carpet cleaning

Giving thanks.

"Dude, don't say it..."

A Human balloon being sold to a child balloon.

We couldn't help but notice, Mary, that you got a new fleece, and it's white as snow.

Dog emojis.

I was bitten by a radioactive bedbug – My superpower is getting a solid eight hours of sleep every night. Wow. So lucky.

I slept funny last night!

"I've forgotten your face but I remember your mask."

'Let me put it this way...don't start watching any miniseries on TV.'

" When you're done fooling around with those lights, come and eat your dinner, it's getting cold!"