Lighter Enthusiast Gifts

'Don't look now, but there's my former flame.'

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

Gun laws US

Meanwhile, in Florida: Little Free Library/Little Free Firearms

"Someday, these will be installed in every home and business that wants to seem artsy."

'The Torch Holder'.

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

"Especially modified you say..."

Tedious Romantic.

"Talk about energy efficient...every lightbulb in this house will outlive you!"

'That's one heck of a recoil, Bob!'

"But now the good guy with a gun has a foot wound."

Hunters wait at the bottom of a ski jump ramp.

Joan of Arc goes sword shopping.

"Heck of a shot, son, but that's not a deer."

"Bang!"

'What do we do about this online order for 6,000 rounds of ammo, an assault rifle, an automatic handgun and a shotgun?'

Progress?

'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

You need a new reading light

'Guns Galore Inc' 'Prolong your Life'

Gun Ego

"Hon, where's the butter?"

'We will conduct the background check. Our fortune, Madame Zula, will conduct a complimentary future check.'

'I take it this is your first big game hunt?!!'

"The way I see it, the Constitution cuts both ways. The First Amendment gives you the right to say what you want, but the Second Amendment gives me the right to shoot you for it."

'Don't tell anyone I asked... but why don't we have muskets?'

'So anyways, I got a great deal on a candle factory from this total sucker and,,, hey, watcha reading'

"Notice how the artist uses light to draw in the viewer."

"It helps prevent side collisions."

'My therapist cured me of using humour as a defence, these days I pack a .45.'