Lifestyles Gifts

"It's a good mix of disaffected and affected."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Low-Energy Drinks

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I can't wait 'til hunting is googling and gathering is calling out for delivery.'

Cat in a flap

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

"I shop, therefore I am."

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Meanwhile in Hollywood

The Modern Novel.

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

Item #3715 - cozy cardigan

i-teddy

Fur Baby

Trust

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

'OK. Lose weight, stop smoking, get fit, get a better job, spend more time with the kids, cut back on the booze, be better with money and buy a speed boat.'

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

'I think I'm getting somewhere. On the way over I stopped to smell the flowers.'

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'