Lifestyles Gifts

"It's a good mix of disaffected and affected."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Low-Energy Drinks

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

"We're airship people, not mega-airship people."

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

Cat in a flap

"I shop, therefore I am."

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

Meanwhile in Hollywood

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

i-teddy

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

Fur Baby

Item #3715 - cozy cardigan

Trust

'OK. Lose weight, stop smoking, get fit, get a better job, spend more time with the kids, cut back on the booze, be better with money and buy a speed boat.'

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

'Apparently it downloads data to your brain.'

'I think I'm getting somewhere. On the way over I stopped to smell the flowers.'

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

'No, you won't live longer if you give up sex and alcohol. But it'll seem like it.'