Lifestyle Gifts

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

'You know you're 40 when...'

'I'm giving up all of my good habits. They're easier to stop doing than bad habits.'

Pants...Before & After

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

I can't believe I ate all that kale for nothing.

"I sleep poorly anyway, so you might as well put me in high-risk investments."

Trust

Low-Energy Drinks

Life begins at 60

Life In The fast Lane: '24 hours without food is a long, long time...'

'Cut back on the women and song. You can still have the wine though.'

Does it spark joy?

"Why didn't you tell me before you were a strict vegetarian?"

'Happiness is place between too little and too much.'

I'm having difficulty finding balance between work and ... what is that other thing?'

"I got my wife a book on decluttering and the first thing to go was me."

"I'm a stay-at-home mom without kids."

'I'm very active. I'm always jumping to conclusions, stretching the truth, skipping lunch, and jogging my memory. With all that jumping, stretching, skipping and jogging, I still can't lose weight.'

Cat in a flap

"I'm giving up giving up!"

Over the years, Sid had refined travel on the path of least resistance to a fine art.

Exercise vs Laxative.

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

Obesity: Mechanical & Biological.

'These lifestyle programmes aren't as relaxing as they used to be.'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

"I'm just waiting to become fashionable again"

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

"I'm burning my little black dresses and moving upstate."

"it's just... we're too lazy to have any of our own."

"What's the right age to tell a child that she's ironic?"

"Are we talking about life style or orientation?"

'Committee For The Preservation Of Cads'

“Please—outside of work I’m not your boss. I’m just Dave with the nicer car, bigger house, and three-hundred-dollar haircut.”