Contemporary Lifestyle Gifts

"I shop, therefore I am."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Low-Energy Drinks

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

Cat in a flap

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

Meanwhile in Hollywood

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

"You are still here."

'Fetching newspapers is over. Now I aggregate blogs for him.'

i-teddy

Fur Baby

Trust

'No, you won't live longer if you give up sex and alcohol. But it'll seem like it.'

Upper East Side Dog Park

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

'Apparently it downloads data to your brain.'

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

'Mom, can you tell me about the days before Pilates and Latte's?'