Life Experiences Gifts

Women

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

We only go round once, but it can be quite the loop-de-loop! (Published originally on December 21, 2013.)

School of Hard Knocks. (Frank walks through door as bucket of water falls on his head.)

'My parents couldn't afford to send me to college, so they let me spend a night at a Ramada.'

"The closer I get to 50 the more I think it's young."

"I'm out! A free man. Done my time. Paid my debt to society. Strike that off my bucket list."

Tourists

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"I'm new here. How much do we leave for a tip?"

Kissing the Blarney Stone.

I love Museum Shops

'He's been back packing around India and doesn't he want everyone to know it.'

Life and Death

Snake Charming

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

"I turned five. That's why I'm here. What are you in for?"

'The salary isn't much, but the expense account to entertain the boss, ohh-la-la!'

"Do you know the biggest thing I've learned in my thirty nine years?"

"FYI that the novocaine will numb the pain caused by the drill but won’t help with the pain caused by the overhead adult contemporary music."

Foreigner ready for the hunt

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

Road signs of Aging

'What I like about Magaloof Tracey is it feels so foreign.'

"Wow, that kid does not like Georgia O'Keeffe."

'I think we should eat out in the hotel tomorrow dear.'

"My parents are nice, school's going well, and I'm basically a good kid. Unfortunately, there's no money or fame in being normal."

'Don't look now but it's that guy from Pennsylvania that you dumped,'

"When you get to Uni be sure to let that hair down responsibly."

Benefits of Living Abroad

"You may be asking for trouble, Ernie."

"But what did you expect to find in a JAPANESE topless restaurant, dear?"

"Let me tell you what it's like to be seven in this city."

'Yes, Bwana?'