License Lamenters Gifts

DMV Photos. The problem with photo I.D. is photo ego. Hey, this doesn't look like me!

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

"Lost most of my sight, hearing, teeth and hair. Thank God I still god my driver license."

'The penguin is upset...'

'Should I try a three point turn?' - 'Better not, we only have 30 minutes left.'

Find out who has the Licensing Rights to Armegeddon.

Judge chasing fly with gavel.

"I think you better let me drive, I haven't renewed your license yet."

MBA, PhD £100,000 student loan. Please Help.

'You better have a hunting license.'

'Do you mean LAWYER?'

What to do if the kids take away your car.

'I'd like to have my name legally changed to 'Dot Com.''

"Says here underage kids can get a hardship license if they have a legitimate reason to drive a car."

"Then they revoked his hunting license!"

DMV - Enter Here

"So, David. Do you have a permit for that weapon?"

'I'm here for trying to keep my nose clean. I got caught stealing a packet of tissues.'

Throwing Away Music

"Since the cracked down on gun licences there's some bleedin awful shots about!"

'Here's your license!'

'Could you sentence my client to just quality time, your honor?'

Joe's Bar: "Forget Her" Hour, 5-8.

'Do you swear to tell the truth even though you'd be crazy not to lie?'

'No, I'm not part of an elaborate kickback scheme.'

"This is an insult to everyone who carpools."

'Two witnesses can testify that at the time of the robbery I was miles away assaulting someone.'

'Wanna bet they don't have telly licences?'

'No license? You mean you're an illegal Beagle?'

"If it pleases the court, your honour, I would like to present these small gifts to the jury."

'He lost his licence after 35 years and it's been that long since he's walked anywhere!'

Court House. It's too late to file my copyright claim. Ah, the statute of limitations on the statute of imitations!

We've the devil on one side and the deep blue sea on the other...'

The first clerk of the first DMV.