Letters Aficionado Gifts

'He said he knows the letters but he doesn't know the words.'

Edgar Allen Poe

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

'Sir, will that be business or first class?'

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

Stephen Spender.

Gunter Grass

Trilby - 'The old studio'.

"No chips, but I did snag the new Hiaasen."

Archeologist Deciphers Limerick Heiroglyphs

"You have no idea what it's like to be a 'just between you and me' person in a 'just between you and I' world."

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

Noel Coward.

"He was a big man, but he moved like a cat."

"Wait, wait, back up, back up. Who the #!@! is George Orwell?"

My Literary Influences

Ironing Punctuation

Trilby - 'The sweet melodic phrase.'

'I can hold a match to his notebook.'

Frontispiece to 'Dombey and Son'

Sherlock Holmes Museum: No Hounds.

'He speaks for our entire generation. Pity he's such a bore...'

'I think we're closing in on the missing calligrapher.'

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'Oh no! Is this a blogger I saw before me?'

'Excellent job, Fenwick, especially the part where you employ Magic Realism to fudge third-quarter earnings!'

LIBRARY, 'Sorry, Mr. Wimble -- you've had just about enough Kafka for one day.'

Don't you see, Kreutzer? That's why we have all this literature. So you won't duplicate an experiment that's already been done, and there's no reason at all why you should be duplicating Smedly's experiments. After all, he shares a lab with you.

Encyclopedic Novel Slam.

Friedrich Schiller

How a poet works

'Right so lets be clear, when you said my book was a turgid reworking of a sad collection of hackneyed ideas you actually meant that it was a groundbreaking work of originality and genius...'