Leisure Literature Lover Gifts

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

First Novels.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Thomas Mann.

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

The DaVinci Code

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Voltaire

'I play so hard that I have no time to work hard.'

"Now I really hate poetry."

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

Jean-Paul Sartre

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

Television Readers.

"It's days like this that make me long for days like this."

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.