Legal Guru Gifts

'You have the contract drafted by the lawyer. This is his bill for it.'

A third of the buck stops here.

'Let's see what the lawyer oracle will tell us...'

'Run it by legal and then a couple of talk-show hosts.'

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

'It's one of Larry King's earliest shows.'

Robots In The Boardroom

"Can we please just stick to the core business?"

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

'Miss Carruthers, check and see if we have an extradition treaty with Disneyland.'

The Modern Novel.

"The Supreme Court says a corporation is a 'person?' Well, have you ever tried to take a corporation out for a nice, friendly beer?"

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

Truth

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

'There have been a few niggling little concerns expressed about the lack of diversity in the supreme court.'

"If you're trying to find yourself, Mr. Ludlow, just ping your phone."

'Our strategy is perfect! This is the customers' fault - they don't think the way WE do!'

"I know it's a big risk, Fred, but don't lose sight of its strongest selling point: You're taking it, not me!"

"It's a self-driving skateboard."

Statue of Security

Crocodile Selfie

Windows or Mac?

nstead of looking at fish bowl, a kid watches the fish on TV as they are being video taped.

Lady Justice.

'I'm sorry, but you have a very impressive resume, and at this company, we find competence threatening.'

"We're in luck, not a word about retrospectivity."

'Console 3GMEGA3D plus 3K+SUPERAUDIO USB 35,000.000 MGB...'

"Manafort's was the best flip yet."

'Don't be nervous but I think we're about to go LIVE on the new system.'

Comments. Complaints. Constitutional Amendments.

Of course we're faster and more powerful now. I just think we commanded more respect when we filled an entire room.