Legal Geek Gifts

Computer questionning a witness.

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

US Credit: 'I'm down grading your credit rating...'

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"The sign ruins our surprise attack, but it's a big OSHA fine if we don't have it."

How a Bill Becomes a Law, 2023

Best System in the World

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

' Of course there isn't one law for the rich and another for the poor..There's only one impartial law. For all who can afford it.'

'You have the contract drafted by the lawyer. This is his bill for it.'

'It was more than my finest hour, Paltrow. It was my finest billable hour.'

Obama's Financial Reform Pill: I hope they won't need a glass of water.

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

Department of Who's Your Daddy?

'I don't suppose there's any way I could serve my sentence on line?'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

Beware of the Legislation

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

"Impartiality becomes you."

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

"We, the jury, award the plaintiffs 100 trillion dollars - just because."

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

Impeachment Wave

Mice in the Commons

Counsel examining witness

Law Offices

'Okay, where's Obama?'

Trump Indicted

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of multiculturalism.'

A throng runs out the courthouse to follow a car that is driving away decorated with a sign that reads "Just Acquitted".

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'