Lease Law Enthusiast Gifts

'Well so much for not needing a break clause in the lease.'

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

Violent Crime Statistics

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

Lady Justice.

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'

"Haven't you ever heard of the first amendment?"

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

"Impartiality becomes you."

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."