Lazy Day Laughers Gifts

"I knew we agreed that you could be a stay-at-home dad, but that's when we decide to have children."

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

Lazy Octopus

Wordplay: Hibernation.

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

Cat and mouse

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

"Right now Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing sit-ups."

Catatonic

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

To be honest, I'd just as soon as lay in the yard, but he so looks forward to it.

A Golden Non-Retriever

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

'I've never known a dog who gets tired so quickly.'

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"I'm thinking of starting my own range of 'inactive' wear."

"Such a refreshing day...I've spent 18 hours between napping and comatose."

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'I would love to be more energetic, but there is nothing I can do: It's a genetic condition...'

'If it's a universal remote, how come it doesn't work on the refrigerator?'

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

'I'll set snooze for an extra month.'

'Hey, there are pedals on this thing!'

"That doesn't look like setting the table to me."