Lazy Day Humorist Gifts

"I'm tired - let's call it tall enough."

'So, are we going for a walk or what?'

'He used to be my tiger, now he's nothing more than a skunk, a boar and a lying toad.'

'This time it's really just a stick!'

'It's the only exercise he gets these days. Fly swotting'.

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

Wordplay: Hibernation.

Lazy Octopus

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

American Idle.

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

Cat and mouse

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

"Right now Arnold Schwarzenegger is doing sit-ups."

A Golden Non-Retriever

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

Catatonic

'well, Fred, I see you're finally embracing technology.'

To be honest, I'd just as soon as lay in the yard, but he so looks forward to it.

"I'm thinking of starting my own range of 'inactive' wear."

'I've never known a dog who gets tired so quickly.'

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

Cat puts off paying gas bill, to sleep longer...

'Football...Beer...Popcorn...that is Bernie's Stimulus Package.'

"Such a refreshing day...I've spent 18 hours between napping and comatose."

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"He's an indoor cat."

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.