Lawn Expert Gifts

Woman coaxing husband into mowing lawn by dangling a bottle of beer in front of him.

'Yes of course he can borrow my lawn mower just as long as he only uses it in my garden...'

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

"First time pruning?"

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

Yardless: Please help

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

A Mix Up Between the Buggy and Lawn Mower.

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

Lawnmower

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

"Mulch madness"

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

"The election's over, Trump won, the illegals are being deported and I'm here for one of them there high-paying American jobs he promised."

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

"Must get a longer cable."

Three different categories of lawnmower.

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

Grandpa gets more than he bargained for when his lawnmower takes flight as a helicopter would.

'George! This way quick!'

A man raking his lawn watches as the leaves climb back into the trees.

"Beware of God"

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'