Lawn Maintenance Enthusiast Gifts

Three different categories of lawnmower.

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

"First time pruning?"

I want to rip out our lawn and plant a wild meadow. And I want lost of well-mown grass. What do you recommend? Nursery open. Just a sec. I'll check with my dad. No way! Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm not suggesting a marriage counselor!

The Last Leaf

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

"Mulch madness"

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'George! This way quick!'

'It's your fault. I told you to watch that wet spot.'

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

"Dad, can we please just buy a week wacker?"

'Don't forget to put gas in the car and the mower.'

Beware of the Lawn

The Scottish Lawn

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

Robotic man mowing the lawn

Mowing the Bottle-Garden

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

"Prepare to meet thy blower."

A psychic mows the lawn.

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

Death upgrades to a strimmer

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

Lawn mower - must get longer cable