Lawn Chaos Enthusiast Gifts

"Jeepers, what happened to your power cord?"

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

Man's cooking explodes.

The very noisy, but enjoyable game of Crowquet.

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

"Mulch madness"

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

Ten out of ten for effort...

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

Anti-inflammation recipes

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

'George! This way quick!'

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

Disaster in the kitchen.

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Beware of the Lawn

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

Mowing the Bottle-Garden

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

"Not cool washing sheep in the dishwasher people!"

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

"That is why you don't put 'instant rice' in a slow cooker."

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.