Laugh-loving Elder Gifts

'We all shrink as we get older... You'll just have to be a little patient!'

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"I never thought turning eighty would be so much fun!"

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

'As a matter of fact, I have the heart of a 30-year-old woman.'

Help!I am being forced to eat vegetables

"King and clown—why can't I be both?"

To make taking their daily array of medicines more fun, many seniors are using the new Pill-A-Pult.

'Mr. Franklin. What did I tell you about wheelies in the hallway?'

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

"Meanwhile, in the Memory Care Unit... I said, your secret’s safe with me."

'No kidding? I didn't realize 80 is the new 20!'

"Bad boys don't die. They just ride in to the sunset!"

'Didn't anyone tell you this is an old people's home?'

"I'm living proof that life begins at forty-three."

'You are always living in the past!'

At the Old Bikers' Home

'I like to give them a sporting chance.'

"It's the Florida kid."

"I see Arthur's arthritus is acting up again."

"Fancy a bit of the other what, Reg?"

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

"The wild walker"

"You've lost a little weight since your last physical, but you're also two inches shorter."

100th Birthday

Exercise Classes for the over 60s - Pottering 8pm.

"Enjoy your retirement. I'm sure you will survive all of us. Hahaha, just kidding!"

'There's no ice so I dropped my teeth in it.'

"He's been in there for about three weeks. . . I warned him that he was too old to sit in a seventies bean bag."

"Welcome to my third annual Senior Soak-A-Palooza!"

Make Love Handles Not War

Do not dare ask me about my grandchildren!