Late-night Revelers Gifts

'Let's keep it simple -- stop serving me when you run out of beer.'

'24 hour drinking... I'll drink to that!'

"So, with internet shopping and guaranteed next-day delivery, I figured now was as good a time as any to hang my sack up and retire."

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

David Letterman

"The last week of school is totally cool!"

"Well, if you must know, he makes me laugh."

Santa entering a pool for a swim

Unbeknown to other, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

'This place looks welcoming enough,Alf!'

'Face it, 24 hour grocery stores were made for people like us.'

'Would you believe, all this is just part of a new reality show?'

What makes you think you'd make a good bouncer? My enthusiasm...I'm prepared to give anything a bash!

'I promised my Dad I'd be home by ten but I didn't say if that was P.M. or A.M..'

'You're not calling the Help Desk again, are you?'

"To wealth, even if it's only on paper."

'Hope 2010 is living up to your bubbly enthusiasm of last night and early this morning'

A couple leaves their child at a "Child Check" counter before entering a fancy restaurant.

"Single malt scotches are good but I prefer regular old comfort booze."

"The trouble with this town is there is no day life."

'-and to all you night owls out there...'

'What are you grinning at? It's only 5.30.'

"It's the kind of trade you get at an all-night supermarket, kid."

'Ar ... to be sore, to be sore.' - Post St Patrick's Day.

"Club Applebee's - Late Night"

'Let's keep it simple -- stop serving me when you run out of beer.'

Night Owls v. Morning People

'Just another young couple out burning the midnight rubber.'

"The best part about the holidays is all the holidays."

"Waiting is the worst part of Christmas...and the best part!"

24-hour Hot Dog Machine.

'...then he asked me to drive down the road with the mobile to give him phone sex.'

'And the crowd goes wild! In all the wrong ways.'

I suppose you're wondering why I summoned you to the café at midnight, minion. Not really. They're keeping the voting machines in a warehouse on the outskirts of town. I'm not telling you to break in … and I'm not telling you to make it look like anti-Trump Communist illegal immigrants from China and Mexico rigged the machines on behalf of ISIS to elect Hillary Clinton. Does this have anything to do with all those "Trump was robbed" cupcakes you had me order? I'm not telling you that.

'Sorry dude, you're killing me, I can't party all night, every night: I'm diurnal remember!'