Language Game Guru Pillows

"Mom, Dad, sis-I'm not like you. I'm-I'm not a palindrome."

A Puppet Named Juan

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Thru versus Through Traffic

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

Punctuation Police

A Copy Editor and His Dog

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

'The Questioner'

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

T. S. Eliot Meets Beavis And Butthead

"I try to write a little bit every day."

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

Homo Gamus

'Now I know why the strategy guide warned against entering the 5th stage. Awesome!'

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'

Dating an English Major

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

You've read the book's dust jacket. Now, play the video game!

"Sorry I'm late. I overslept." "Is that even a real word?"

Personnel - "This letter of recommendation is full of misspellings!"

'Curious how all four previous employers spelt 'exceptional' with just an 'x'.'

Some card-game puns

Introducing...Anagraman.

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"Baxter...about this report...your punctuation, spelling and grammar are perfect. No one can understand it!"

'Stick them up...'

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'