Language Development Pillows

"His first word was 'Dotcom'."

Baby Crossword Puzzle.

Early man had 127 words for rock...and no words for anything else.

'She said her first 'I hate you' today.'

I only said my first word

"How does she EVER expect me to develop the articulacy required for a competitive economy if she refuses to talk properly!"

"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."

"He just said his first word!"

"I've recorded every noise my baby makes, so that when he's older I can play it back and he can tell me what he was trying to say. . .!"

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

"We don't know, we can't understand a word he says."

'Well, he certainly has his Father's vocabulary.'

'He's said his first words...' 'Replacement bus service.'

"I'd like me first word to be profound, but I'll probably panic and blurt out 'Mama' like every other baby."

"I'd just like to say what a pleasure it is to be here"

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

Campaign for Plain English

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

Thru versus Through Traffic

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Assault 'n' Vinegar

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

A Copy Editor and His Dog