Language Connoisseur Gifts

Sign reads "Elevater out of service. We apologise for any misspelling."

"Don't you think you run the risk of offending someone."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

Wordplay: In The Bag.

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

The Family Joules: Part 21

'Whoooa,MAN,check out this STORM! It's PELTING down!'

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

'Stick them up...'

The Gettysburg Address in process.

Henry the amazing talking dog.

"It lost a little something in translation."

"Please hold applause until end of dragon."

Men gossiping

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

'This is the fun part...waiting to find out just what we've ordered.

'Mom and dad...if someone threw a rock at me, it would really be like killing two birds with one stone.' 'I told you if we had a child, he'd be a wise-quacker.'

'I made a hundred on the Spanish test. Gracias.'

We Will Beat Any Genuine Quote...

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

Staff Yearbook

Say it with flowers - available in any language.

His Hers Pers Vis Xyrs Hirs TBD

"Oui, c'est bon. It is, how you Americans say, 'Magically Delicious'."