Knot Novice Gifts

"Sorry, but I don't know how to tie a Reef Knot. Give me a simple project, like building a computer."

A desert island with a knotted palm tree

'I can't figure out why I keep getting wind knots.'

'HEY! Shouldn't that be a reef-knot?!'

'Sorry, I can't come: Young Master has joined the scouts and tied me up with a fancy knot I can't work out...'

"This blood knot ought to be re-named the blood, sweat and tears knot."

Scuba: 'You call that a knot, now this is a knot.'

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

'Don't try to turn tail and run. That's just what they want.'

"I've been promoted from barbarian pillager to management. Do you know how to tie a neck tie?"

Brad Pitt.

"This is my first book, but if I like it I may buy another in the near future."

'Help!'

"What's my collar size?"

'Today we learned how to make knots!'

Pandemic Orphans

"My goodness, your back is really knotted up this morning, isn't it?"

Know Your Knots!

"Top quality line, expert knot, expensive lure: Now, that's how you recognise a Sport Fisherman..."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

Children's Self-Help Books. How to Look for a Lost Toy Without Moving a Muscle. It IS Possible to Make a More Annoying Sound! Tying the Impossible Knot. Mom! MOM! Moooooom!

From 'Theory of Knots': Thumb Knot, Spanish Bowline and Double-knotted shoelace which is impossible to open.

'You may well, Ms. Ferris, one day write a 'Fifty Shades of Grey' bonkbuster, but today your account is one shade of red.'

Carole Jean's First "Big Girl" Heels

I really hope the agent likes my submission... - '' - 'This is perfect.' - '' - 'Absolutley perfect.'

'Exactly which school of acupuncture are you from?'

"We won't lose any more socks in the laundry...I knotted them all together."

'You just continue to grow.'

'She loves me...she loves my knot...she loves me...she loves my knot...'

'It's not as easy as it looks.'

'Ok, Ok. We'll run through it one more time. The rabbit pops up, goes around the tree ....'

'Hereafter you sew your own buttons on your suits of armor. This is the tenth needle I've ruined tonight.'

'I think we should look into a smaller hammer and bigger nails for your next do-it-yourself project'

"Leo and I know how much you like your Christmas sweater, so we thought we'd make you one ourselves this year."

Archery Supplies, Inc. When we outsourced production abroad, did anyone explain to our supplier what we meant by "bows and arrows"?