Kitchen Garden Kiddo T-Shirts

"Naw, mom says there ain't no candy corn seeds!"

Allotment

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"I thought the cake came out awfully dense."

'I've no time for these foragers - they come into the area and snap up all the best houses...'

"I can't make it out - on the packet it said radishes."

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

'It's not for homework. It's for traction.'

"I'm unable to process this image."

'Do we have any empty calories in this house!!'

'... Of course, I had to train for this job. I went to sundae school.'

Boy baking a cake.

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

...If sauce has not begun to thicken after 10 minutes, pour contents back into can and wait for your wife to get home.

"It's called being preemptive."

'Be sure to ask George about his tomatoes.'

UFO = Unidentified frying object.

Bakery. The smell of freshly baked bread is the only truly perfect man-made thing on earth.

Instead of a cap and gown Mike got a hairnet and spatula.

"But if you let me lick everything, you won't have to do any dishes."

'The two things you cook best are meatloaf and apple pie!... Which one is this?'

Summer holiday activities the whole family will love.

"Your roots are showing."

"Ok, who just gave my cooking a 1-star review on Yelp?"

"Tia Carmen, is this our house or is it our home?"

'Whoa! When did we get that big Tupperware bowl?'

"Oh, Kevin. You are truly the Tomato Whisperer."

'There! Now all we gotta decide is what we're gonna make!'

'Do you mind if my son watches you cook? I'm trying to bring him up to be a vegetarian.'

'You said we can grow our own food. So, where's the hot dog seeds.'

'What do you mean you're not hungry?'

Gardening for Beginners

Planting Dreams.

"Can I move in with you?"

"One man's apocalypse is another man's mandate."