Kitchen Chaos Fan Pillows

"Oh my god- the salad's on fire!"

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

Computer Room.

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Cookbooks

"I don't think the turkey's going to be done on time. That's the dishwasher."

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

Slices of bread rescuing burnt toast.

Man's cooking explodes.

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Ten out of ten for effort...

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

Anti-inflammation recipes

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

Chef De Party.

It's all gravy.

Disaster in the kitchen.

Waiter' You betta stop that food fight, you SILLY fools! Here comes the Maitre D' !'

Incorrect weather forecasts.

Cooking

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

'I'm sorry we put bearnaise sauce on your fillet by mistake. Randy will have it off there in a jiffy.'

"You get one every time you order something online."

"Now why would a seagull fly in here and try to establish a rapport with me?"

Woman in need of an extractor fan.