Keyboard Philosopher Gifts

"He's very disciplined about his writing, every morning he stares at the keyboard for at least 4 hours before he allows himself a cup of tea!"

My Obituary

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"Technology isn't making me smarter. It's allowing me to be dumb, faster."

"Yes, social media's a great way to express your opinions - shame you feel 'ignored and unappreciated by an aloof, faceless boss' - but that's because I haven't a clue who you are or what you do around here!"

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

'This computer has a fast modem, the latest Pentium, increased RAM, a huge hard drive and broadband connections. Only one problem...slow pointer fingers.'

A woman playing a keyboard

It's all fixed. Just don't type anything that contains the letter ‘E'.

I wish you kids would get off your electronics and learn a practical skill. Work with your hands! What does he think we're doing?!! Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

Press Any Key. No, Not That One.

Bill Bailey

'No, boss, this isn't a secret code. My spell check is broken and this is what my typing actually looks like.'

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."

"It's a self-driving skateboard."

The Work-from-Home-Polka

'He's a man of few works. He likes to talk, he just has a limited vocabulary.'

Information about information about information about information.

Domestic Spying Drones

I think therefore I am.

"Keep practicing, and someday you'll be able to play the two songs you remember at houses that also have pianos."

The Escape Key

'The hardest thing is convincing the wife that when I'm staring out of the window I'm actually composing a tweet.'

'It's not encrypted, Captain. That's just the clerk's usual typing.'

"Whoa - not so fast! I've got to check your browsing history first..."

"I don't know who will be obsolete first, me or my computer."

'Sorry, Kevin. You have given an incorrect command.'

Computer Life

Artificial intelligence discovers racism

'Why is it when you hit two keys by mistake, the one you don't want appears on the screen?'

New technologies.