Keto Comedians Gifts

"Tork, Me rethinking Keto diet."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

Soup of the month.

"That's it. We’re toast."

'Like death by salad.'

'But Mom, I like potatoes in their jackets.'

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"I specialise in themed dinners 'Titanic', 'Armageddon' , 'Towering Inferno'..."

Why did Ernie take that off his wrist and put it here when he had to leave the kitchen? For safety reasons. A watched pot never boils. Ernie says you are what you eat. It's true in his case. Ernie is just like his food. He is sweet, and has some but not too much spice. Plus there's nothing artificial about him. Also like his food, Ernie is an acquired taste. And to me they have both become irresistibly delicious!

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

Aqua Filter (frog jumping out).

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

'I don't think that's what they mean by reducing the wine.'

Chef uses Harp to cut Sausages

'Does this thing get channel four.'

The Complete Spaghetti Dinner.

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

"How would you like your steak sir—really well done or raw? We've got a new chef."

"So why do you need a ladder to make pancakes?"

'It's all homemade.'

"Looks like it's time to make the banana bread."

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

Chef copy robot

Family working together

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'